There are basically two ways to set an individual video to not start automatically. In order to change this behavior for a specific video, you need to do one of two things:
1. Create a VOD player template for this or any other video that you want to not start automatically and set that player template behavior that way. Then, when you embed the video, make sure you have the querystring &player=[ID] in the URL.
2. When you embed the video, add this additional querystring: &autostart=false to the video.
NOTE: When you have VOD files in a list or a layout, they will revert to whatever player is the VOD default player or is assigned to the layout. There is no way currently to tell an individual video in a list not to start automatically if the default player is set to start automatically.